Energy vampires. How to save yourself
Ever been bitten by an energy vampire? Energy vampires are people who prey on your kindness and literally suck your energy dry.
We all know people who boost their own energy by taking energy from others via an argument, criticism, belittlement, or just a very one-sided conversation. You step away from these kinds of interactions feeling depleted, invisible, and energetically drained.
While not every draining interaction qualifies the other person as an energy vampire, some people just project more negative energy than others.
You might have a co-worker who brags about accomplishments and downplays the contributions of other team members.
Or maybe you know a drama queen who takes up unreasonable amounts of your time and overshares information.
But what if you could use your Core Values to practice energy alignment… and with just a few minor adjustments, recover from these exchanges?
(And what if it’s easier than you think?)
No matter what situation you’re navigating, many of us find it hard to say, “No, thank you,” or to tactfully step away because we're afraid of being impolite.
But there are plenty of ways to remove yourself from a potential energy zapper’s bite - with grace and tact.
When leaving isn't an option, you can still maintain your energy level by making a few minor adjustments.
Here are a few ideas:
Recognize the signs: Notice when your energy feels drained by tuning into your physical reactions during and after interpersonal interactions. Is there a tightening in your chest when a certain person calls you? Do you feel exhausted or "energetically slimed”? These are signs that you may have encountered an energy vampire. Now it’s time to take action.
Set clear boundaries: Know what types of activities work well for you to do with these energy vampires - and which ones might trap you. Maybe meeting for coffee or a quick lunch is bearable, but inviting that person to your home feels too risky. (Be sure to set clear beginning and end times, so you know what to expect.)
Be a stone wall: Act like a stone wall by not giving energy vampires your energy. If you don’t give them the response they’re looking for (i.e. your open ear, your sympathy, your support, etc.), they’ll likely lose interest and move on to someone else.
Limit your exposure: If the energy vampire is someone you can’t avoid (like a boss or co-parent), allow yourself to limit contact with that person. Communicate as little as possible and use technology to your advantage (i.e. use text messaging rather than meet in-person or make plans by phone call).
Learn the power of saying NO: NO is a complete sentence. It’s okay to say a polite “No, thank you,” to anyone who depletes your energy. It’s okay (beneficial, even!) to hold energetic boundaries with the word, “NO!” Practice saying, “No, thank you,” with energy vampires - and monitor the response.
The most important thing to remember is that protecting your own well-being is okay (even when it means saying NO or limiting your exposure to energy vampires).
You’re NOT being selfish. You’re practicing self-sovereignty.
You’re choosing to take care of yourself before you take care of everyone else - and this is a sacred boundary you’re allowed to honor.
Want to reframe your mindset around saying NO to energy vampires… and understand why you struggle with negative feedback & criticism?
Join me for my upcoming Salon on March 14 at 2pm EST.
I’ll teach you practical tools designed to help you reframe feedback with curiosity and courage (something especially important when you’re dealing with energy vampires in daily life).
Sign up for just $97 right here. This virtual Salon begins March 14 at 2pm EST.
💫 Andrea
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